Melt down

This past week has been the big push to get my things mostly packed so Jim could move his things in. Jim is my friend who's subleasing my home while I'm away.  He's a great guy and wonderfully patient through this whole process. We've agreed to keep my things in storage here until I get back and I've even got my bed set up in the "guest room".
Never the less, it's been rough. After several weeks of procrastinating, the move was overwhelming at best. (Imagine if I'd had to move out completely !!) Saturday the various piles of boxes and things yet unboxed threatened to consume me. Usually fairly organized, I found myself wandering between rooms accomplishing virtually nothing. Every little thing distracted me. I was having a hard time forming sentences. Fortunately my girlfriend Lynn showed up and in lieu of our date for tea, jumped in and made sense of things. A fellow capricorn and detached from the emotions of my process, she helped me push and shove boxes of books and other treasures across the hall. Thank you Lynn...

Sunday I woke up in my bedroom for the last time. That set the tone. I continued the move in silence, trying to focus on the increadible journey in front of me and the good fortune to have this opportunity. Then I came across yet another card from Mike stashed in some book. I started feeling VERY alone and spiraled down from there. I had truly believed that my next move would be with him, setting up a new home, not wittling down my current existance. I kept moving. The thing that undid me was taking my earring holder off the wall. Why that?? Why would that thing ellicite unrestrained wails? Still I kept moving. The stacked boxes in my new room making it hard to get to the closet. Organizing had become futile. Then Carol called. Thank God Carol called. She wanted to talk. "Come on over, I'm here." By the time she got here I was sitting on the floor, sucking down a cold beer in a puddle of tears (pretty, I know). She grabbed a beer and started working and talking and laughing. A couple of beers and one pizza later, she'd not only tamed the mess of stuff, but had quieted the unteathered emotions of this very weary traveler to be.

Thank God for all my dear friends. Each of you hold a distinct and special place in my heart.